Overcoming Fear Of Lack

Hebrews 13:5-6

"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say in confidence, "The lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.  What can man do to me?"     

There are many fears that come upon us when we are afflicted with health issues.  For me, and probably for many others as well, the primary concern was how to manage financially when faced with the loss of a job and along with it, health insurance.   There were some very dark days for me after I lost my job four years ago.   In the three years that I battled with the government to give me back some of the thousands of dollars I had paid into disability all those years, I lost everything.  My 401k, nearly all of my IRA, my house which I had to sell at a $60,000 loss.  I was forced to sell my car because it could not make the trip from Wisconsin to Maine without brake work which I could not afford.  I gave away everything I owned to my neighbors, who we elderly and disabled, including most of my clothes.  Since my sons were going to drive me back to Maine, all that we could take along was what would fit in a Toyota Camry.  

And then I moved back in with my parents.  The feeling of failure, uselessness and of having absolutely nothing to show for the years I had worked, were overwhelming.  To top it off, when my daughter came back from Wisconsin, she had rented a u-haul and in it had the very last of my few possessions, my beloved sewing machines, one of which I had recently paid to repair.  When they were about halfway here, they had an accident ( no one was hurt, praise God) but my poor sewing machines were in pieces all over the highway.   I thought " you have got to be kidding.  This HAS to be some sort of a test!"  My friends lovingly nicknamed me Joba because I even picked up some sort of virus and broke out in a rash!

I share this only to make the point that through it all, God was faithful and never abandoned me.  What had to happen, however, was I had to get past feeling sorry for myself.  The day I realized that Jesus had not even a pillow to rest His head upon, was just that day.  And surely His emotional pain of being abandoned by His friends in His hour of need was far worse than anything I had suffered.  At least I had my friends and family and a place to live.  Further, no pain that multiple sclerosis could throw at me would ever approach the pain of crucifixion.   So, as Joyce Meyer has so aptly put it, I got over myself.  

From that day on my life turned around.   I won my disability case.  My son bought a house and took me in.  I started making dolls again, which gave me a hobby that helped to keep my mind and hands active.  GOD is SO good!!!!!

Tying this in with the Hebrews 13 Scripture, I believe for me at least, the key was learning to be content in spite of my circumstances, learning to overcome the fear of lack.  You see, God promises never to leave us, but if we get caught up worrying about our circumstances, seeking money and not being content, we risk totally missing His presence AND His presents.  Those little gifts that He gives us every day, which often go unnoticed when we have too much "stuff."

For instance, my day pretty much revolves around sitting in my recliner watching TV and working on dolls.  But when birds come to the feeder outside my window, particularly two pair of cardinals which I have become fond of, my heart is so blessed.  What a gift.   In fact, I have not seen the cardinals for a couple of days, but as I was writing these words, I looked up, there was the beautiful male cardinal at my feeder, briefly, and then he was gone.  

Jesus tells us to ask for our bread daily.  This keeps us going back each day for more.  It teaches us to live one day at a time and not worry about the future.  It teaches us contentment with each day's portion.  Friends, it took losing  everything I had to learn that lesson. I can honestly say, however, that I would not change a thing.  I still do not have much money, but I have the "peace that passes all understanding." For that I am truly grateful.   Best of all, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that His promise is true.  He will never abandon or forsake me.  And regardless of how difficult your circumstances might be with these difficult economic times,  neither will He abandon you.